The Case of the Ex….

"And I heard you're doing you, and you heard I'm doing better, and all I had to do was put two and two together" -Weezy

Most times when you date someone you gain mutual friends and also grow bonds with their family. So after the dust settles from a break up how you do you handle your new found friends and family? Since its holiday season many people are wondering should I stop by his/her mother, aunt, grandparents and friends house? I think a person can maintain a relationship with your Ex… friends and family long as it is healthy and respectable. What I mean by healthy? The fact that you broke means something was not working… so don't try to hang out with the family/friends to get your mate back. Don't make your mate feel uncomfortable with you being around so much. You have to make sure you do not hinder each other's future and current relationships by always being on the scene. Sometimes in order to make a healthy transition you may need to take a break from the entire situation so you can heal. If you want to continue to hang with family and friends just know that their loyalty will always be to your Ex, so don't be tacky and ask questions about them and what they have going on. That will make them feel in the middle which is not a good place. Don't try to over shine the new mate by showing up at every event, you are not winning just because you are at every event and they like it's only because your Ex family and friends are comfortable with you. Don't think because the new mate is in the corner by his/her self you won, they just have to get to know each other. And when that happens don't question them or get mad at them for hanging with the new mate, its life you have to trust that they can be adults and not keep mess up. This means sometimes you may have to decline that invite and maybe do lunch on another day or stop by the day before or after the event. It's a fact of life everyone will be someone's Ex and someone's next…… just make sure you handle yourself accordingly. Just from personal events in my life I have learned not to over step my boundaries when it comes to the family and friends I meet with my Ex's some of them you will be happy not to have to deal with them while others you may find you like their family and friends more than them. I always make sure if I am dating someone they are comfortable with me stopping by Ex family/friends house. And if I have an Ex that comes around too I handle that as well. My family is very friendly so most times they may invite one of my Ex's and I have to let them know… sometimes is good but damn yall having him bringing a dish… lol please feel free to share your stories or tips to help that EX THAT NEVER GO AWAY!!!